The VERY EX-HUSBAND

I just hate him.



The hate that I feel for him consumes me at times.   Like right now.

EVERY fiber of my body, every breath I take in and exhale,....... hates him.

All I see is black.
Every muscle in me is tensed up even my jaw is clenched,...and I just hate him.

And I hate him for making me hate him.

Because, I don't hate people in general. I have a high tolerance for people overall.  So, when I am brought to the wrath of hate, as he brings me to so often lately, it truly is retched. 

I feel that hate is a super strong emotion, and an awful one at that. However... he seems to bring out the worst in me.  He makes me question my own sanity for EVER being remotely attracted to ANY part of him in ANY way shape or form.
 Truly I believe I was completely insane during the year I met him.  For many reasons, not just the being with him part.

 I made some STUPID choices, mistakes and I only have my foolish self to blame.  It is the one thing in life I am forever regretful and remorseful of.  

My life would be so different now.  Better for sure.  Instead.... I'm where I am.  GOD I hate him.